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GREAT COLLECTION OF DANECOOK

Issue 1

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1
In a small town come on business engineer, lived in a single room in the hotel. In the evening, went to bed, but midnight could not sleep. Then he stood up, dial a number, said nothing, lay down, and quietly fell asleep.

REPLY

He called loudly snoring neighbor behind the wall.
2
People went to the beach, and the next day he was fired for incompetence.

REPLY

Man he worked as an announcer on the radio. On the beach he decided to swim and almost fell into the jaws of the sharks. Extremely upset, he began to stutter.
3
Cowboy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of water. Without saying a word, the bartender pulls from his belt a pistol and shoots up. The cowboy says "thank you" and leaves.

REPLY

The cowboy was a hiccup. Fright he stopped hiccuping and water it is no longer needed.
4
There was a guy bill. He loved Mary. One day when bill was in a cafe, had a violent thunderstorm. When bill returned home, he saw an open window and lying among the broken glass in the pool of water dead Mary. What happened?

REPLY

Mary is fish bill. During the storm the wind aquarium with Mary fell off the table onto the floor and shattered.
5
On the deck of the ship, standing a mile from shore, stood a girl. Suddenly, the deck has fallen human hand.

REPLY

Two brothers fell in love with this girl and argued among themselves who will quickly swim from shore to ship. The criterion for achieving the goal was to touch the ship. One of the brothers, seeing that loses, cut off his hand and threw it on the deck.
6
A boy and a girl sat down in a cafe to drink juice. The girl wants a glass, and a boy or two. The boy runs up to the counter and orders a five glasses. Two of them leave on the rack, and three brings to the table. Why did he do that?

REPLY

The boy badly burred and therefore did not want the girl had heard how he says "three glasses".

However, it is unclear what prevented him, saying, "Please, two glasses of juice for me and one for my ladies". 't guessed, probably...

7
Two men entered the room, saw the murderer and his bloody sacrifice. They exchanged opinions about what they saw and calmly walked out.

REPLY

They looked at the Tretyakov gallery picture "Ivan the terrible and his son Ivan".
8
The writer has finished a sentence and put a period. Roman "Beaten path" was completed. Suddenly he grabbed the manuscript, and "Beaten paths" was not.

REPLY

The writer has renamed his novel.
9
Man, not having a passport in one day visits thirty different countries. In each of them meet and see off, and every country he leaves of his own volition.

REPLY

This man is a courier, carrying mail by embassies and diplomatic missions. As you know, the Embassy is considered the territory of a foreign power.
10
On the bedroom ceiling a few fresh spots of human blood.

REPLY

The master bedroom slammed on the ceiling a few mosquitoes.
11
The robber got into the box, looked around, lay down on the bed and quietly fell asleep.

REPLY

He lost the key to her own apartment, and had to climb through the window.
12
One traveler was captured by the Amazons. They want to kill him, but promised to do one dying request. What should be the request to avoid imminent death?

REPLY

"Let me kill the most beautiful of you."
b) "Let me kill the ugly of you."
13
One day, the young artist decided to paint a portrait of the old ugly banker. Friends warned him: in vain did! If you draw beautiful, the banker will not pay: I will say that the portrait is bad. If the artist priukrasit it, the old miser, too, will refuse to pay, this time on the pretext of the lack of similarity. Friends were right. "It's not me, but some stuffed!" 'retorted the banker and left, not without paying a penny. However, after a few days he came back from the artist, and with difficulty persuaded him to sell the picture for the price, ten times the original.

REPLY

The artist hung the portrait in the exhibition titled "the Miser". Over greedy banker laughed the whole city. He had to buy the picture.
14
Interview with twin brothers.
- You were born in one day?
- Yes.
"You twins?
- No.
How is this possible?

REPLY

They are triplets.
15
From the tram jumps out and quickly runs away man, followed by another, who yells, "take All, only a return ticket!" Why is it so important ticket?

REPLY

Pickpocket stole passenger tram wallet, where lay a winning lottery ticket to win a car, but the passenger quickly noticed he was missing.
16
American Charles Sambre was furious when 20 years have found that hear without a hearing aid is better than him. He went with claims to the doctor, give him wearing the device, but the doctor was furious not less Sambre.

REPLY

The patient wore the device on the healthy ear.
17
On one of the Odessa street was three tailor shop. The first tailor advertised itself as: "the Best workshop in Odessa!" Second: "the Best workshop in the world!" Third outdid them both. How?

REPLY

"The best workshop on this street!"
18
On the windowsill of the ninth floor two kiss. Who are they?

REPLY

The pigeons.
19
The SS great Britain after the repair was unable to leave the dock. Why?

REPLY

After repair, the boat is wider than the output from the dock.
20
People went into the forest, and he was gone. Where's he gone?

REPLY

"He" in this mystery - this forest. It was cut down.
21
A former sailor put an ad in the newspaper: "For a small fee, send C.O.D. reliable remedy for sea sickness". After some time he was arrested, although he was not deceived.

REPLY

He sent all this recipe: "stay home!"
22
Pretty much incubator chickens are killed in the first days after hatching from eggs because of the lack of reflex on the location of food and water. We have to hope that some of them accidentally discover the one and the other, while others will emulate them. How to reduce losses of chickens?

REPLY

To newborn Chicks place three or four days, in which the reflex is already developed.
23
In one research Institute was not one chemical reaction. Finally, it was able to spend one chemist. But the response was only when he was alone in the laboratory. if it was someone else, the reaction was not as other. Put the camera chemist does everything as well as others, as the reaction proceeds. What's the matter?

REPLY

Chemist sang songs while working, in vitro there was a resonance, and the reaction was. With strangers he was embarrassed to sing.
24
A man walks into a store, buys a sausage and asks her to cut, but not across, and along. The clerk asks, "are You a fireman?" - "Yes." How did she know?

REPLY

The man was in uniform.
25
It is known from history that the English king Richard the Lionheart, returning from the second crusade, disappeared on the way home. It was later revealed that he was captured and imprisoned in the castle of the Duke of Austria. Find Richard took the Troubadour Blondel Nilski. He loved his king knight and poet, with whom he wrote and sang many songs. But how to find Richard? Ask not, you can hurt yourself. It turns out that you can drive past the prison, which is cooked for a friend, and not know that he is behind the wall. How can that be?

REPLY

Troubadour went and sang songs composed by them, together with Richard and known only to him. Once out of the basement he heard picked up the chorus.

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Share your impressions!

Your comments:

Vika
2014-05-10 20:56:26
Cool
veronia
2014-03-14 11:25:38
cool!Klas
Anonymous
2014-03-14 11:20:26
funny!
koslenko mark
2013-09-19 14:05:21
18:doves
JULIA
2013-05-05 16:00:17
wow Klas
Dasha
2013-04-19 17:07:37
Puzzle - class!
elzira
2013-03-24 18:27:12
answers must be immediately
Ellina
2012-08-19 02:10:02
very good for improving memory!!
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